Coffee
and Cigarettes (*)
review by Jon
Waterman
There really isn’t a plot to this movie, so I can’t
give my usual paragraph synopsis. What I can say is that the
film is comprised of eleven self-serving (no pun intended)
segments where people sit at various locales while drinking
coffee and smoking cigarettes. That’s about it. It’s
a limited menu, and non-smoking’s all filled up. Still
want to stay?
What a horrible collection this turned out to be. Basically
the movie takes these short films that writer/director Jim
Jarmusch did on his spare time and clumps them together. They
all deal with coffee and cigarettes. They almost all have big
name stars. They all take place in a diner/restaurant. Aside
from a couple late references to earlier segments, that’s
about all the vignettes have in common.
Well, that’s not entirely true. They’re all incredibly
awkward to watch. Most also suffer from being unbearably slow
moving. Let’s get something straight right now. Awkward
pauses in conversations usually are not funny. Reaction shots
to awkward dialogue can be. Unfortunately, everyone in this
movie plays it completely straight. They are lifeless beyond
belief. Why not call the dang thing “Robots and Cigarettes?” Steven
Wright and Roberto Benigni star in the first short, which is
surprisingly devoid of laughs or any sort of reasonable pace,
thus crushing the chance for any momentum to be built up as
the picture moved along.
I don’t know. I must be missing something. I’m
not seeing what the point is of making this compilation film.
There doesn’t seem to be any real statement made about
coffee, cigarettes, diners, or these social situations. None
of the segments capture anything relatable, either, because
they mostly deal with first meetings between two celebrities.
Oh, and the cinematography and editing were incredibly bad.
Jump cuts abound. I don’t need to see the top of the
table so often, either. Thanks. Honestly, most of the shorts
give off this poorly executed student film vibe. Instead of
covering the story, Jarmusch covered the scene. That’s
the wrong way to go about it. This doesn’t really matter,
but couldn’t one of the stories have happened at someone’s
home? People still drink coffee at home, right? Why not make
a segment about a couple in the morning? Just an idea. I’m
probably way off base with whatever is the purpose of the piece.
A couple of the segments would work very well on their own
as quirky short films. However, once they’re balled up
with the rest of the movie, the life is virtually sucked out
of them. Bill Murray with Gza and Rza of the Wu-Tang was fantastic;
Tom Waits with Iggy Pop had their moments – mostly thanks
to Waits’ great acting; and the final chapter starring
William Rice and Taylor Mead should charm the hell out of anyone
watching. But three (really two and a half) out of eleven isn’t
enough to make it worthwhile.
No refill for me, thanks. Just the check. Don’t expect
a big tip, either. Service was terrible.
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