THE PINK PANTHER (2006 & 1963) and BUBBA HO-TEP
Hey everyone. I'm going to keep this update short. Below you'll find three new reviews. Soon I'll have my top and bottom ten lists posted on main review page, so be on the lookout for that. I still have quite a bit to review and I'm seeing more all the time, so keep coming back. Enjoy.
The Pink Panther (2006)
Review by Jon Waterman
*1/2
During an on-field celebration at a soccer match, the world’s most famous player is murdered. Taken along with his life was the world’s most famous diamond: the Pink Panther. In order to solve the mystery, Chief Inspector Dreyfus decides to start up a prominent investigation with an incompetent nitwit at the helm. That way, he can conduct the real investigation without the criminals catching on. Dreyfus finds his nitwit in the form of France’s own Jacques Clouseau. Of course, Inspector Clouseau has no idea that he’s just a front, but that won’t stop him from trying to find the culprit and close the case.
This is one of the loosest remakes I’ve ever seen. I can only assume it’s a rehash of the whole original series, but I can’t be sure, because at the time of this review, I’ve only seen “The Pink Panther” from 1963. But I can tell you it’s absolutely nothing like that movie. This new incarnation stars Steve Martin as Clouseau who also co-wrote it with Len Blum (“Stripes,” “Beethoven’s 2nd,” and “Private Parts”). Martin’s characterization of the Inspector is slightly less clumsy and a lot more idiotic. But at least this version attempts to tell jokes rather than just rely on physical humor and a dragging plot. Even though most of the comedy falls flat on its face more times than Clouseau, there are a couple of surprising parts.
(more....)
++++++++++
The Pink Panther (1963)
Review by Jon Waterman
*1/2
A mastermind thief dubbed The Phantom is still at large, and there’s good reason to suspect he’ll attempt to strike again soon. Princess Dala is visiting a winter hot spot and will be attending some elite soirees. She’s at risk, because with her is the famous pink panther diamond, a very large, valuable stone whose only flaw is a slight bit of coloration in the shape of its namesake. These parties always act as a catalyst for The Phantom’s heists, but luckily there’s a detective on the case. The bumbling Inspector Jacques Clouseau is at your service.
Simply put, this film is not funny. I think the Phantom stole all the jokes before they had a chance to be filmed. Contemporary audiences looking for a film that stars Peter Sellers will be surprised that they don’t find it here. Oh, he’s in the movie quite a bit, but he takes a backseat to virtually everyone else. That’s not what makes the movie bad, although seeing as how he’s the only likable character and we hardly get any worthy screen time with the Inspector doesn’t help.
(more....)
+++++++++
Bubba Ho-Tep
Review by Jon Waterman
*1/2
What if Elvis Presley never actually died? Perhaps he got sick of his life and traded places with an uncanny impersonator who took over. Maybe he’s actually slowly deteriorating inside a small nursing/retirement home down in Texas. Now, what if John F. Kennedy’s brain wasn’t actually missing? Perhaps the government decided to implant it into the head of a young black man. Maybe that man is now well-aged and in the same home with the king. Okay, stay with me here. What if a cursed mummy suddenly popped up? Perhaps he began feeding on the souls of the old folks residing there. Maybe the only people that can stop him are Elvis and JFK.
What if you have a promising, extremely original concept….ahhh, forget it. Suffice it to say, the actual movie doesn’t quite live up to the same standards as the king’s sequenced jumpsuits. I think I was just expecting a different movie: one with more action, better pacing and even more quirk. The film does come off as campy weird at times, but seems to take itself a little bit too seriously, what with Elvis’ voice over narrative reflections on the subtle tragedy of growing old. Now, I know this Mr. Presley can’t gyrate his hips like he used to, but more action of some kind is in order.
(more....)
The Pink Panther (2006)
Review by Jon Waterman
*1/2
During an on-field celebration at a soccer match, the world’s most famous player is murdered. Taken along with his life was the world’s most famous diamond: the Pink Panther. In order to solve the mystery, Chief Inspector Dreyfus decides to start up a prominent investigation with an incompetent nitwit at the helm. That way, he can conduct the real investigation without the criminals catching on. Dreyfus finds his nitwit in the form of France’s own Jacques Clouseau. Of course, Inspector Clouseau has no idea that he’s just a front, but that won’t stop him from trying to find the culprit and close the case.This is one of the loosest remakes I’ve ever seen. I can only assume it’s a rehash of the whole original series, but I can’t be sure, because at the time of this review, I’ve only seen “The Pink Panther” from 1963. But I can tell you it’s absolutely nothing like that movie. This new incarnation stars Steve Martin as Clouseau who also co-wrote it with Len Blum (“Stripes,” “Beethoven’s 2nd,” and “Private Parts”). Martin’s characterization of the Inspector is slightly less clumsy and a lot more idiotic. But at least this version attempts to tell jokes rather than just rely on physical humor and a dragging plot. Even though most of the comedy falls flat on its face more times than Clouseau, there are a couple of surprising parts.
(more....)
++++++++++
The Pink Panther (1963)
Review by Jon Waterman
*1/2
A mastermind thief dubbed The Phantom is still at large, and there’s good reason to suspect he’ll attempt to strike again soon. Princess Dala is visiting a winter hot spot and will be attending some elite soirees. She’s at risk, because with her is the famous pink panther diamond, a very large, valuable stone whose only flaw is a slight bit of coloration in the shape of its namesake. These parties always act as a catalyst for The Phantom’s heists, but luckily there’s a detective on the case. The bumbling Inspector Jacques Clouseau is at your service.Simply put, this film is not funny. I think the Phantom stole all the jokes before they had a chance to be filmed. Contemporary audiences looking for a film that stars Peter Sellers will be surprised that they don’t find it here. Oh, he’s in the movie quite a bit, but he takes a backseat to virtually everyone else. That’s not what makes the movie bad, although seeing as how he’s the only likable character and we hardly get any worthy screen time with the Inspector doesn’t help.
(more....)
+++++++++
Bubba Ho-Tep
Review by Jon Waterman
*1/2
What if Elvis Presley never actually died? Perhaps he got sick of his life and traded places with an uncanny impersonator who took over. Maybe he’s actually slowly deteriorating inside a small nursing/retirement home down in Texas. Now, what if John F. Kennedy’s brain wasn’t actually missing? Perhaps the government decided to implant it into the head of a young black man. Maybe that man is now well-aged and in the same home with the king. Okay, stay with me here. What if a cursed mummy suddenly popped up? Perhaps he began feeding on the souls of the old folks residing there. Maybe the only people that can stop him are Elvis and JFK.What if you have a promising, extremely original concept….ahhh, forget it. Suffice it to say, the actual movie doesn’t quite live up to the same standards as the king’s sequenced jumpsuits. I think I was just expecting a different movie: one with more action, better pacing and even more quirk. The film does come off as campy weird at times, but seems to take itself a little bit too seriously, what with Elvis’ voice over narrative reflections on the subtle tragedy of growing old. Now, I know this Mr. Presley can’t gyrate his hips like he used to, but more action of some kind is in order.
(more....)
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