Hey all. Sorry about the month long absence. I was in the process of moving and dealing with the local cable/internet company. After a long, hard fought battle, I'm up and running once again. I have a huge backlog that doesn't appear to be getting any smaller any time soon. There's tons I want to see. Let me start clearing some of my inbox space by posting three new reviews. I'll have more throughout the week, so please, keep checking back.



Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
Review by Jon Waterman

**1/2

Willy Wonka, the famous reclusive candy creator, has announced a contest that will allow five lucky children a chance to tour his factory. One of those five will also receive a special, secret bonus prize. The whole world scrambles and buys Wonka bars, hoping to get one of the golden tickets that will gain them entry into a palatial building that has been closed to the public (and its former employees) for many years. Charlie is one of those hopefuls. However, his large family is too poor to afford anything more than one bar a year. Will he beat the odds and become one of the chosen few?

I think it’s pretty safe to say I’m not spoiling anything when I announce that Charlie does in fact get to be part of the tour. But before we get there, let’s talk a little about the lead-in. This is the best part. The writing (by John August – “Go” and “Big Fish”) is at its sharpest and most fun during this opening. The movie is charming and funny and witty and original. What was meant to be an appetizer actually ended up spoiling the dinner, because once inside the factory, things sort of fell off.
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+++++++++


War of the Worlds (2005)
Review by Jon Waterman

*1/2

Aliens come down from outer space and attempt a hostile takeover of our planet. They have big ships whose force fields destroy any projectiles before they even come close to the vessels, comprehensively sweeping probes so that there’s no place to hide, and deadly laser weapons that will vaporize you upon contact. But Director Steven Spielberg wants you to believe that’s just a side story. The real focus of attention is on a somewhat deadbeat dad who is forced to grow up instantly in order to save his kids (that he’s watching for the weekend) from these horrible attacks on our society. But he obviously isn’t growing much, because his ultimate goal is to travel from New Jersey to Boston where the mother is hopefully staying. Everything will be fine if we can just get you kids to mommy.

Unfortunately, putting family first doesn’t exactly get the entertainment sparks flying as much as giant alien creatures with ray guns demolishing the planet. A big part of the problem is the way the relationships were handled on screen. The script, written by Josh “Chain Reaction” Friedman and the hit and miss David Koepp, tries to establish way too much backstory within the first ten minutes without actually revealing any of it. There’s so much allusion in the set-up that you almost feel like you miss something. In fact, the whole movie up to the alien invasion is extremely boring and poorly constructed to the point of being laughable…but not in the way they intended.
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+++++++++


Batman Begins
Review by Jon Waterman

***

As a young boy, Bruce Wayne witnessed the murder of his parents in one of the many dank alleys of Gotham City. Since that moment, he has been determined to train in multiple arenas and become a multi-faceted warrior. His goal is to exact revenge on not only the man who killed his father, but also to put fear in the hearts of all of the city’s lowlifes. He’s studied with the best and he’s ready to hit the streets. Armed with all the money he needs, thanks to inheriting one of the world’s largest corporations, cool toys and gadgets, thanks to the research and development department of said company, and those combat skills, all he needs to take on those nasty villains is an identity, a symbol that he can embody that instills terror. Hmmm…what should it be…?

I don’t want to ruin anything for you, but......it’s a bat. I know, no big surprise there. In fact, the whole thing is rather void of true suspense or bombshells. The problem is that the story of Batman has permeated our culture so deeply that most of the people know the vital plot points going in to the picture, or if not, then can figure them out pretty quickly. It becomes pretty similar to watching “Star Wars: Episode III” in that you want to see how those benchmarks are hit and how the filmmakers hit them.
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