Terminator Week continues. I bring you two reviews today. Scroll down for the original Terminator movie review. Check back later for T2. And next week, I'm taking a break from the action movies and will review The Shape of Things as well as a couple other non-destructive films. Enjoy.
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Review by Jon Waterman
1/2 star
A group of legendary characters from around the world work together to track down and defeat an evil genius attempting to start a world war.
This league is formed of the most classic literary characters in history. Under the command of Allan Quatermain (Sean Connery) are Captain Nemo (Naseeruddin Shah), Mina Harker (Peta Wilson), Rodney Skinner as the guy who stole the invisible man’s formula (who knew – played by Tony Curran), Dorian Gray (Stuart Townsend), Tom Sawyer (Shane West) and Dr. Jekyll along with alter ego Mr. Hyde (Jason Flemyng). Each brings a unique ability to the table. It’s pretty much “Mystery Men” all over again, only we now have pre-packaged literary legends instead of created superheroes and the humor is unintentional.
The dialogue sounds like it was lifted straight from the comic book it was based upon. Now, I haven’t read the comic, but let me explain. The interchanges between characters are clunky and awkward. This is not meant to insult the writers of the comic, it’s meant to point out the difference in style. Acted spoken words work much differently than written words that one reads. Screenwriter James Robinson may have been trying to make this movie a more accurate adaptation, but instead gave us unusual and shoddy dialogue. Not only that, but some of the situations are just downright absurd. I’m sorry, but just because you may not have seen a car before, doesn’t mean you can defy the laws of physics by jumping out of one at high speeds and magically land on the ground without tumbling or even having to run. That’s bull. I’m all for suspension of disbelief (I’ll grant the dual Hyde monster premise and all of that “good” stuff), but keep it reasonable, please.
The special effects were abysmal. Easily the worst I’ve seen in a contemporary film. Movies from the 80s had better computer graphic effects than this hurried piece of suck. It’s as if they didn’t even try. Maybe they didn’t have the budget, but if they didn’t, then why try to pass off some second-rate hack job as the real deal? Ugh. Makes me sick that these people may still be working in the city as “professionals.”
The acting sucks. The plot sucked. The effects sucked. The boring movie seemed incredibly longer than it actually was. I hope it wasn’t the intention of this film to encourage people to read the books these characters came from. I have a feeling such a boring, poor quality movie will deter anyone from wanting to learn more about these characters’ solo adventures. I bet the comic is far superior and wittier and would actually spawn some interest in the classics. To sum up: Worse than “The Hulk,” but not by much.
The Terminator
Review by Jon Waterman
***1/2
A war is being fought between man and machine in the year 2029. Metal has taken on a life of it’s own and man may be no match for its strength. The humans have one hope: Sarah Connor. She is the mother of a great leader. She just doesn’t know it yet. Unfortunately, the future does. A cyborg is sent back from the future to kill Sarah before her child is even born. The humans send back a man of their own to fend off the machine and rescue Sarah so her unborn child can lead the resistance.
The key to making a successful science-fiction movie lies within the believability of the script. “The Terminator” is one of the greater science-fiction movies out there. First time director James Cameron shares writing duties with Gale Anne Hurd (producer and Cameron’s future wife) with a bit of help on the dialogue from William Wisher. They created a tightly constructed backstory that leads these two creatures (human and non) to the present day. The psychologist in the film acts as the audience, questioning all the details and looking for flaws in the logic. The reasoning behind the time-travel and everything in the movie works. One thing I did not understand is the lack of culture shock on the part of Kyle Reese, the human being from the future (played by Michael Biehn). Perhaps there’s no time to be amazed by still-standing buildings and the thousands of happy people wearing bright clothing and the everything else when you have to track down the great Sarah Connor (played by Linda Hamilton – Cameron’s future wife). In fact, I wasn’t too interested in most of the characters from the 80s. Paul Winfield as the seen-it-all Lieutenant was my favorite of the bunch. Most of them weren’t developed enough and only acted in ways to further the plotline. The point of the film was the chase, anyway.
The film works so well because it crosses a variety of genres. Of course there is the science-fiction aspect. However, more prominently featured are the action and thriller facets. And, as there is with most movies, we have the love story (although it is very plot-driven). The Terminator himself (played by Arnold Schwarzenegger of the “Conan” series) is treated like a movie monster. The early part of the film acts as a slasher flick as he goes from house to house killing off humans. Suspenseful music and darkened rooms abound. Later, as the backstory gets more fleshed out, the film becomes essentially a straight-up robotic cat and living mouse action movie. The concept of the Terminator is a frightening thought. An incredibly strong machine hell bent on destroying you and possibly cannot be stopped no matter what you throw at it.
Another great aspect of the film is the underlying message it conveys. It shows that everyone has some purpose on the planet. You never know what your existence might mean in the long run. Sure most people won’t take that message to heart, but the fact that a moral or a subtle concept like that exists in a destruction fest such as this really says something good about this film.
Throw some cheesy synthesized sounds of 80s for the score (by Brad Fiedel) on top of the thrilling, heart-pounding excitement of people and machines being shot and beaten up and cars getting destroyed and things blowing up real good and you got yourself one hell of a movie.
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
Review by Jon Waterman
1/2 star
A group of legendary characters from around the world work together to track down and defeat an evil genius attempting to start a world war.
This league is formed of the most classic literary characters in history. Under the command of Allan Quatermain (Sean Connery) are Captain Nemo (Naseeruddin Shah), Mina Harker (Peta Wilson), Rodney Skinner as the guy who stole the invisible man’s formula (who knew – played by Tony Curran), Dorian Gray (Stuart Townsend), Tom Sawyer (Shane West) and Dr. Jekyll along with alter ego Mr. Hyde (Jason Flemyng). Each brings a unique ability to the table. It’s pretty much “Mystery Men” all over again, only we now have pre-packaged literary legends instead of created superheroes and the humor is unintentional.
The dialogue sounds like it was lifted straight from the comic book it was based upon. Now, I haven’t read the comic, but let me explain. The interchanges between characters are clunky and awkward. This is not meant to insult the writers of the comic, it’s meant to point out the difference in style. Acted spoken words work much differently than written words that one reads. Screenwriter James Robinson may have been trying to make this movie a more accurate adaptation, but instead gave us unusual and shoddy dialogue. Not only that, but some of the situations are just downright absurd. I’m sorry, but just because you may not have seen a car before, doesn’t mean you can defy the laws of physics by jumping out of one at high speeds and magically land on the ground without tumbling or even having to run. That’s bull. I’m all for suspension of disbelief (I’ll grant the dual Hyde monster premise and all of that “good” stuff), but keep it reasonable, please.
The special effects were abysmal. Easily the worst I’ve seen in a contemporary film. Movies from the 80s had better computer graphic effects than this hurried piece of suck. It’s as if they didn’t even try. Maybe they didn’t have the budget, but if they didn’t, then why try to pass off some second-rate hack job as the real deal? Ugh. Makes me sick that these people may still be working in the city as “professionals.”
The acting sucks. The plot sucked. The effects sucked. The boring movie seemed incredibly longer than it actually was. I hope it wasn’t the intention of this film to encourage people to read the books these characters came from. I have a feeling such a boring, poor quality movie will deter anyone from wanting to learn more about these characters’ solo adventures. I bet the comic is far superior and wittier and would actually spawn some interest in the classics. To sum up: Worse than “The Hulk,” but not by much.
The Terminator
Review by Jon Waterman
***1/2
A war is being fought between man and machine in the year 2029. Metal has taken on a life of it’s own and man may be no match for its strength. The humans have one hope: Sarah Connor. She is the mother of a great leader. She just doesn’t know it yet. Unfortunately, the future does. A cyborg is sent back from the future to kill Sarah before her child is even born. The humans send back a man of their own to fend off the machine and rescue Sarah so her unborn child can lead the resistance.
The key to making a successful science-fiction movie lies within the believability of the script. “The Terminator” is one of the greater science-fiction movies out there. First time director James Cameron shares writing duties with Gale Anne Hurd (producer and Cameron’s future wife) with a bit of help on the dialogue from William Wisher. They created a tightly constructed backstory that leads these two creatures (human and non) to the present day. The psychologist in the film acts as the audience, questioning all the details and looking for flaws in the logic. The reasoning behind the time-travel and everything in the movie works. One thing I did not understand is the lack of culture shock on the part of Kyle Reese, the human being from the future (played by Michael Biehn). Perhaps there’s no time to be amazed by still-standing buildings and the thousands of happy people wearing bright clothing and the everything else when you have to track down the great Sarah Connor (played by Linda Hamilton – Cameron’s future wife). In fact, I wasn’t too interested in most of the characters from the 80s. Paul Winfield as the seen-it-all Lieutenant was my favorite of the bunch. Most of them weren’t developed enough and only acted in ways to further the plotline. The point of the film was the chase, anyway.
The film works so well because it crosses a variety of genres. Of course there is the science-fiction aspect. However, more prominently featured are the action and thriller facets. And, as there is with most movies, we have the love story (although it is very plot-driven). The Terminator himself (played by Arnold Schwarzenegger of the “Conan” series) is treated like a movie monster. The early part of the film acts as a slasher flick as he goes from house to house killing off humans. Suspenseful music and darkened rooms abound. Later, as the backstory gets more fleshed out, the film becomes essentially a straight-up robotic cat and living mouse action movie. The concept of the Terminator is a frightening thought. An incredibly strong machine hell bent on destroying you and possibly cannot be stopped no matter what you throw at it.
Another great aspect of the film is the underlying message it conveys. It shows that everyone has some purpose on the planet. You never know what your existence might mean in the long run. Sure most people won’t take that message to heart, but the fact that a moral or a subtle concept like that exists in a destruction fest such as this really says something good about this film.
Throw some cheesy synthesized sounds of 80s for the score (by Brad Fiedel) on top of the thrilling, heart-pounding excitement of people and machines being shot and beaten up and cars getting destroyed and things blowing up real good and you got yourself one hell of a movie.
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